Letter to Landon

 With Landon's first birthday fast approaching, I took a look through his baby book and came across the letter we wrote to him before he was born. Wanting to make sure my only handwritten copy didn't get lost or chewed on by a very busy toddling baby boy, I thought I would include it on Landon's blog:)

November 18th, 2010

Dear Landon,

For five months now we have dreamed about you, wondered about you, marveled at your firsts (first time hearing your heartbeat, first time feeling you kick, first time feeling your tiny, bony foot protruding from my belly) and this week we got to see your face on an ulstrasound and found out you were a boy! We are having a son, and the joy and love we feel for you already is bigger than the sky.
When we arrived at Dr. Case's both Mommy and Daddy were chatting and laughing nervously, just so excited to meet you. When the nurse called us back, we both looked at eachother and smiled, it didn't quite seem real that in a few minutes we would know so much more about you.
The exam room door creaked open moments after the nurse left us, and Dr. Case extended his hand and introduced himself. Landon, in life you will meet all kinds of people; some who make you feel good, warm, and comforted with their kind presence, some, of course, who do not. Landon, Mom and Dad want you to know that you can learn something from ALL types of people. Dr. case was the first kind, though:)
As Daddy held onto Mommy's oustretched hand, Dr. Case told Mommy and Daddy that no matter if you were healthy or sick, boy or girl, he and Dr. Lawler would take care of you...that there was no problem we couldn't work through together, and that he and Dr. Lawler could be added to the long list of people that love you. As you grow, both now and after we are born Landon, I hope you always know those three things to be true.
As the screen flickered to life, Mommy and Daddy watched in awe as your face pieced together before our eyes.
"The chin and mouth look like me!" Mommy exclaimed.
Landon, right away Mom was so struck by how much of herself she could see in you...it was surreal. Daddy looked on with love, so amazed to be seeing you for the first time.
The doctor made measurements of your bones, your body, and your organs as he talked and moved the wand. With a voice that sounded like a smooth, warm cup of tea on a cold day, he reassured us, "All of this looking perfectly normal, healthy."
Landon, we would have loved you no matter if you were crippled and sick or healthy as a horse. As you go through life though, you learn never to take good health for granted...and when we found out how healthy you were, we felt so, so blessed.
As the wand moved and pushed on Mommy's belly some more, we could see your thigh bones (and what was in between them) flash across the screen. Mommy knew right away that you were a boy, before the doctor even said those anticipated words, "It's a boy! You have a son."
It makes me laugh to think how this might be embarrassing for you to read later in life, but if you take anything away from it, imagine the look on your Daddy's face when he found out he was having a son. His eyes twinkeled with so much joy, so much love...I could almost see him imagining all of the things he'll teach you, do with you, enjoy with you. You are so lucky to have him as a Daddy, Landon. He is such a good man and you will learn so much from him.
As I finish writing this letter we are just weeks away from meeting you! We can't wait to see you for the first time, to hold you, to count your little fingers and toes, to talk about who's eyes you have...our excitement is tangible.
Still, as I sit here and can feel your knees, elbows, feet, and fists squirming this way and that in my belly, YOU remind me of something. It's as if I feel the urge to close my eyes, take a deep breath, and imprint this moment in time on my heart...like a photographer capturing a still photo of a fiery sunset.
Landon, in life we can get so focused on looking forward to the future and waiting for that 'next' thing to happen that we can miss the beauty of the journey. Carrying you, nurturing you, and being a part of YOU for nine months has been the most fulfilling journey of my life. Not quite two, yet not fully one...we share a conncetion that is powerful. As you begin this amazing adventure of life and enter this big world, let that connection, that LOVE that Dad, God, and I have with you be the flame that burns inside you, fuels your dreams, makes you reach for the stars. Always remember where you came from, Landon, and let that same love be your safe haven, your soft place to fall.
YOU will do GREAT things.
We love you.

Love,
Mom & Dad